Life after you lose, there’s not a day that goes by without thinking of them, be it 15 years, or more than that. Things like, what would they do in this situation, what would they look like today? Would they be healthy? What would they think about this? What would they think about that?
Many a times we would just not want to think about it, because you have understood that they are gone. And that they are others you have to think about or many more responsibilities to fulfill.
The bond continues to have died many years ago, but the grief it leaves behind is indescribable. In some cases there is no closure, they are stuck in grief or some even suffer from a disorder.
Missing someone who is not there anymore, makes sense but life has to go on and most of the times they just say that they are doing fine. Because they have to enjoy their current life, enjoy with his/her children and keep working on a fulfilling job.
People have the capacity to carry complicated emotions. It may be hard to understand unless you have experienced these emotions.
Remembering a loved one is absolutely normal but it doesn’t mean that they are disrespecting the people who are alive and living with them.
When I spoke to my uncle, who lost his wife few years ago ‘he said, the first year is really hard, and says that the grief still lingers. He pathetically said, that the grief is so hard that it leaves the heart ripped and bruised.
Even a little tap would bring in all the grief again and it goes from bad to worse. People think that people would go over it and forget but those who go through these emotions have a different understanding.
The absence of loved ones is very painful at special times. This feeling is very intense especially for the parents who have lost their child be it of any age.
In my opinion, when a person starts to cry and starts sharing stories, we should listen. And acknowledge that you also remember the person, or console them. Which would bring a kind of comfort to them.
Tears are a mark of their love and pain; we cannot lessen them but surely can try to comfort them. If you have lost your loved one allow yourself to grieve. It is normal.
When we continue to lively bravely, it means that we have learnt to integrate grief and joy in our lives as we are capable of it but hope to overcome grief with Joy with new milestones and new love.
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